FACts of me right at these moments

1. i am really angry and dont think u are my superior!
2. cant u just leave my room and give me peace??!
3. I WANT MY FREEDOM!
4. i'm not talking to u cuz i dun think i am in the wrong!
5. i'm trying to do my work but i cant concentrate!
6. i cant sleep well thanks to u!
7. ishhh...why my life cant be any better?? why must u ruin it...
8. to tell u the truth....i really expecting ur arrival but then it seems that u just ruined it urself!
9. i feel akward staying in the same room as u!
10. i'm not as happy as u!
11. i cant even laugh while watching running man...
12. one happy thing today is there is a hot guy sitting beside me in the bus today...
13. another happy moment, the bus driver is so sweet and treat me so well...
14. i'm sorry to those person i almost burst out to u! from the old grandpa that i didnt say hi back when he said hi or the bus driver who said hi too...(but at least i smile to them)
15. i just want my normal life back...
16. i AM SO NOT HAPPY!!!
17. I WANT MUMMY!
18. I MISS MUMMY!
19. i want my mum to be right here to stand up for me...
20. why cant i even talk to my mum...
21. i want to cry....(why must u restrict me from crying is my tears anyway!!!)
22. I just want to dozzed off to dreamland and never wake up...
23. first time today i had suicidal thought! (i'm alive writing this so u know that i did not suicide)
24. i even want to stay at the hospital....
25. i said swear words today which i normally dont
26. i prefer friends over family!

PS: u doesnt refer to readers it just refers to this particular person who messed up with my life!

Hope u guys have a better day then me! =(

GO AAWAY!

ppl usually say that going home is the best place to go too...

cause here is always ppl to comfort u when u r down....

i hav 2 home..

when im in aussie i feel like going to m'sia home to find comfort....

cause they care the most when im in aussie...

but when i am in m'sia..i wanna go back to aussie....

dilemma dilemma dilemma....

do u ever care??

i just wanna go away from aussie home the nxt 10 days until some1 leaves...

she knows nothing and YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!

im the youngest doesnt mean i have to do all the things!

im the youngest doesnt mean i have to follow whatever u say...

and bcuz u r older then me doesnt mean ur concept is right for me!1

ple leave me alone...

i just want my own personnel place to be in...

my own place where i feel like im the king of the world and i dun need to follow any rules!

i just want my own freedom!!!!!

pls help me...

they think they can even bother to restrict my religion!

RUBISH!!!!

u can take my body but u will never take my heart or mind!!!!!!!!!

hope u guys have a better day then me!

inequal love.

I dun get how same parents same family members same love towards a person can cause...

Inequal love towarss diff person...

Is totally absurd!!!!

Is not fair...

Treating another person with caring and soft tone,

But another sibling gets treated with harsh tone..

:(

Suffocating....

Hav u ever wonder that being the youngest is the least happiest thing ever happen??

My aunt came over so now in the hse I have 2 aunts and a older sister...

Which makes me the youngest at home...

Being the youngest means u hav to do more things...

Example sacrifice ur room..

I came over hereto aussie so I coukd get my own room..

But now...I got to give it up...

Which is not a good thing...

Cuz I dunno where I can find my personal place....

Especially to do script I prefer doing it in a locked room...

Staying with my sis makes me suffocate...

I cant do this in her room or that...

I hate it to the max..I do not hav my personal space and now I dun hav freedom...

My aunt who I stayed a long time here..

Was being a b****...

I get scolded for everything j done..

Including lack lack of sleep. ?.

As I told u a few post earlier. ?.

I hav not been sleeping well..

I guess is bcuz of stresss..

And today when I finally found people peace in sleeping...

After switching over rooms...

I get called..

U cant blame me for throwing a fist....

I dun wanna go...

So just let me be....

Im not ur maid or personal belonging....

Im ur niece...

I have HUMAN RIGHTS TOO!!

Hope u guys are having a better life

Xoxo

Sh3rn

family rivalry

I really hate my sis sometimes....

She oppose everything I done...

Today we need to share room...

So not happy cause she gets to boss around bcuz im sleeping in her room:(

Another thing is my aunt. .ishhhhh la

U think u r older doesnt mean that u r the boss of me...

Is just bcuz she comes and takes my room.

I dun hav my own personal place...

The only one reason I came here is to hav personal space..

:(

i need more...

Time time time...

why cant you give me more time??

i need more time,

feels like 24 hours is not enough....

got script, assignments pilling up one by one....

lets not think of production which will start maybe nxt week...

=(

sleep ar!!!

why u dun let me sleep..

at night cannot sleep in the morning also cannot sleep...

i very tired lately lar...

need to think for this and that....

haih...

i feel like a zombie....

creativity...

give me more lar....

i need it to write the script lar!

not happy!!!!!

hope u guys have more sleep, time to do ur stuff and creativity...

Conflict

i was reading this book just few min ago..

i like the story...

sometimes there are so many conflicts in life...

is like ur head is thinking of this but ur heart wants this..

i dun want to have a bf now but in my heart..

i just hope that i can be the main character for once in my life.

i just so hope that there is this guy that loves me so much

and it will never feel real...

i know it feels weird but this is called internal conflict with the heart and brain...

haih....

shud really stop thinking too much..

xoxo

Sh3rn

A day that all mothers are appreciated =)

Today is the day where all mom are the happiest...

for me i know i;m suppose to celebrate with my mum..

but she is not here with me..

she is sitting in an airplane now going back to M'sia from france...

i hope i was with her...

(i want to go on the europe tour too)

but I LOVE YOU MUMMY!!!

eventhough u are not with me here in aussie...

i will always lve you..

stay pretty strong and healthy!!!

and be careful tomorrow after reaching the airport yeah...

Love you!

xoxo Sh3rn=)

Courage

Have u ever feel like doing something but never have the courage to do it like...

sometimes u feel something bad will happen or u just need one more step to go through it...

that is me..

sometimes i just want to do something but i just dun dare to do it...

sometimes i want to tell the truth but i scared it will backfired...

so courage is the keypoint to the problem...

i always have not enough courage to do something i want..

i'm also scared that people will think badly of me that is why i dun do it...

so try to be more adventureous and build more courage!

xoxo

sh3rn

Flashbacks..

have you ever think back about ur past events and how unfair it is to u and ...

i do...

i never like being in high school.

i always think that high school was full of crap..

i can tell u i was never happy there...

and in my club i got bullied...

i know i was suppose to be the nxt president but no..they give it to some1 else...

they only gave me a form representitive...

WHICH IS SO NOT FAIR! 

after so many years of training up people and working hard to earn the place...

They do not appreciate my work is fine..i should have quite the club and join another club which i have more future in it...

so dissapointing..

besides that...

friends in high school some are real and some are rubbish..

u can know that how they treat you and stuff...

how fake are they...

i always try my best present my most natural to them...

but is tiring cuz they do not know how to appreciate it.

i remember hearing it that true friends will like your true self not a self that u try to fit in.

besides high school...

i also had a flashback on my crushes...

sometimes i think  why can't i be more brave to tell them...

but sometimes im glad i did not...

have u ever wonder why u do this and why this thing is there and stuff...

people always say we do this for a reason or it is there for a reason...

but one thing i want to know is what is the reason...

like Appa Odiga's Lee Junsu always asked...'weh?' (in korean)

haha..too much of grumbling if u have same thoughts let me know...

feel free to comment =)

xoxo

Sh3rn 

It feels like spring in autumn

Today feels like spring compare to autumn....

it suppose to be more rainy and cold..

instead we hav nice sunny weather we some wind blowing...

my aunt is coming over..

and i cant wait....

hehe...

all the things i left she can bring it over for me..YEAH!!!

my parents are in FRANCE!

i want to be there too..why can't i be there too?

the most poor thing is that i have assignments to finish....

i was reading the news yesterday..

i saw so many Malaysian were in Kelana Jaya stadium...

so brave of them to voice out their opinion and want a change for the future generation...

I AM SO PROUD OF U GUYS!!!

i hope i'm there too...

but obviously i cant cause i'm here...

i hope everything goes fine there and there will be a change!!!

i believe in u guys to save Malaysia...

have faith in urself and i know we can see the rainbow and sun after so many rainy days!

be careful too!

xoxo

Sh3rn

My VIDEO!

I'll share with u guys this short film i made for my assignment...

is not the best i did but i like the story..

sorry for the bad filming...

ps:special thanks to:

Eugene Lim, Laura Tan, Emma Johnson, Ben, Michelle Ngu, Shey Wei and Marilyn Ryan.

=)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtKEtJ1p5NA

Thanks for watching give some comments too=)

xoxo

Sh3rn

What a day..

today i thought i will wake up with the most dreamy and feels real at the same time dream...

but i was wrong..although i had this interesting dream but i was almost late for uni=(

i woke up thanks to my aunt or else i will be supper late...

rush and do everything..

eyes is a bit swollen so got to wear specs to uni(which is the 1st time in my life)

i quickly grab my stuff while the head it still dizzy..

and rush out the house...when i was a bout to walking to the curves of my street i then realize tat i forgot my keys...

i quickly run back to get my keys and then rush to the bus stop.

i usually have spare time before the bus comes..but today it was totally diff..

i literally run to the bus stop and thank God the bus driver waited for me...

hop on the bus when to the interchange to change to my nxt bus but unluckily i missed that...

i waited for another 15 min for that bus to reach..

almost late for class and my fren cant recognized me bcuz of my specs....

(see i look diff with specs)

the tutor immediately splits us into groups to disscus and share our treatment...

and the nxt thing i know is that there is this cocky guy in my group.

he cant stop boasting how good is his...

we were suppose to do a 7-20 min short film BUT..

he told us about 2 season of his script...

i was so tired of him talking and my head is spinning crazily due to lack of sleep...

my fren keeps fb msg me..and thanks to that i didnt feel that bored...

ok 2 hours later i went home...my nice and kind fren sent me home...

when i reach home i just realize that my key was missing...

agrhhhh.....i cant find it anywhere and i panicked...
it was not a good sign...

i got to call my aunt(which contains a lot of scolding in the conversation)

and endly we got to change the locks=(

i'm not happy with it...

and i was reading all the fb news feed about the general election..

the more i  read the more sad i felt...

HOW CAN THEY BLAME CHINESE and say CHINESE TSUNAMI!!!

i'm really not happy with my govt...

i hope one day they will understand our pain!

Hope u guys hav a good day!

xoxo

Sh3rn  

A post i never thought i will write about...

Hey guys!

sorry for not posting in a SUPER LONG TIME!

is been a while and i decided to blog...

i never ever imagine myself would ever blog about politics..

haha...this is what this general election had made me become...

It made me be more aware of my country's affair.

When i was younger i don't give a shit about government or politics.

i just want to live in my own happy bubble world where i dun need to care about this..

(that is why some of my friends say i'm naive which i do not agree at all)

I used to think that the government will help to fight for the best for us-Malaysians...

while i was talking to a friend after the 11th general election,

he said why support BN, they are ****(u can use imagine here)

but at that time i dun care..

and i thought that diff ppl hav diff ideas about their views.

but a few years back it made me realize that how corrupt Malaysian was..

I can honestly tell u that i'm not proud being a Malaysian.

Even last year when my lecturer ask me where i'm from...

i answered Malaysia with embarrassment.

The govt has made me feel embarrass of my own nationality.

Today( a day after the GE13)

For the 1st time in my entire life, i was worried about the results of the GE

i even slept late and be a b***h in the morning in class to know the result...

hoping that the opposition party would win.

but by reading the facebook news the whole day let me see how many dirty trick was used..

i was telling my Australian friend about how dirty the election was.

I told her how they play cheat by sending in immigrants (non-malaysian) and allows them to vote.

and the most important point is THEY ARE NOT MALAYSIAN/PR in Malaysia.

my friend asked in shocked "HOW CAN THEY DO THAT!"

i replied her yup that is the government.

i also told her about the 'blackout magic' that occurred when they were counting the ballout!

i told her how ballout appear from no where and we hav additional voters to vote where we actually have this certain amount of ppl in M'sia.

My friend was in total shock to hear about it.

so am i.

I even told her M'sia is actually a rich country but thanks to corruption,

we are facing bankrupt.

i'm so ashamed the deeds they  done.

and i rmb a few days after knowing the news of the immigrant voters,

i told my aunt that the crime rate will increase too.

and yesterday i heard that a few girls got raped.

I don't get why they want to cheat??

it feels like they are cowards who already knows the result but doesn't want to face the result.

and worst thing of all, why did the govt wants to insult us Chinese Malaysian??

if i'm not mistaken Chinese helps out a lot too but suffer from all these craps!

really not happy and disappointed with what they have done.

1 thing happy is that all Malaysian disregarding their race, gender or ethnic come together and support the change !

I'm proud of u guys who fight for it.

I know we have lost this battle but NEVER GIVE UP HOPE!!

we are going to win the next one! (i have a good feeling for it)

cause i can vote the nxt one...hehe

as u can see Rome is not build in one day 

and as Walt disney says:

"All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you." 

and another one

"Never let your head hang down. Never give up and sit down and grieve. Find another way. And don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines."

Richard M. Nixon

Guys never Lose hope!!!

Let's fight together till the end!

Cheers

xoxox

Shern